Quitting Smoking

Among the medicines I was throwing away was a prescription for Wellbutrin, around November, 2002. That was when I quit smoking. I got patches and Wellbutrin, but still it was the hardest thing I've ever done. I remember almost every day of it. The first day was not so hard -- I had a mission and plan, I could do this! The second day, not so great; reality and nicotine withdrawal kicks in.

To distract myself, I tried to bake some cookies. I had a recipe. I read the ingredients -- 1 cup sugar. Then I started thinking about, I don't know what, it was just not about sugar or cookies. Then I remembered, cookies. So I looked at the recipe, and I saw the ingredients -- 1 cup sugar. Then I started thinking about, something else, I don't know what, but it was not about sugar or cookies or anything I was thinking about before. Then I remembered, cookies. So I looked at the recipe. . . . And this went on for four or five iterations until I thought, is this what it's like to be ADD?

I got through the day, but the cookies were never baked. These are my suggestions for any thinking about quitting smoking: (1) You need at least 3-4 weeks or more when you're not working or doing anything stressful to do this. (2)  You can use an oral fixation crutch, but choose something that you will have to wean yourself from quickly, because it's embarrassing!.  (Example, I chose cutting little straws into cigarette shapes to "smoke". I mean, who would want to be caught "smoking" that?) (3) You need drugs, so take everything the doctors give you: patches, happiness pills, whatever, take it all. (4) The tip Kaiser (my insurance company/smoke ender program) suggested: pick a night that is the last night you're a smoker. You can smoke as much as you usually do that day, but, before you go to bed, throw out all your leftover cigarettes, and all your ashtrays and matches and lighters and any smoking-related paraphrenalia. Because when you wake up, you're not going to be a smoker anymore.

(5) Know that every thing that you have ever done while you were smoking, you will need to be prepared to do while you are not smoking. So that might mean, a year later, after you think you're fine, you will get off an airplane and, because the last time you got off an airplane, all you could think of was, where can I smoke, this is what you will think as a "non-smoker", unless you undo the pattern. Every thing you ever did as a smoker, you have to do again as a non-smoker.

(6) Keep busy. Do exercises, go to classes. Build a patio. But don't go to work. Remember? You're on sick leave. Or smoke leave. Or something.

(7) Know this: If you can make it past the first 3 or 4 months, then, any hitch in the road, any little craving, it's just a matter of, Do I really want to make it through this? Because it's really that easy after that.